Hello and welcome to Dominik’s Little Old Purple Column, the 49th of its kind and the one with BIG NEWS for free subscribers – which will be revealed after the theme tune. Are you excited? I’m excited.
THEME TUNE
Ok so the big exciting news for free subscribers is… you’re not getting any more free stuff. I know. Right now the PAID PALS are pissing themselves. For them that’s a great gag – for you? It’s no laughing matter. I have decided I am not giving away stuff for free anymore. If you give something away for nothing, then I worry that ends up being the value. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s wonderful that people have the technical means to make their own TV shows and podcasts and blogs and do it as a hobby and stick them out there and charge nothing and get paid nothing. It gives power to the people. But it’s demonetized how I make a living. And my wife and kids hate that. So, if people want to pay me for stuff? Like my radio stations do. And like the Guardian do? Then great. Otherwise you don’t get this part of the output. You got six series of GamesMaster with me for free. Go and watch it on YouTube or follow me on Twitter where you get free stuff from me even though I hate Elon Musk.
So, I will leave you with this. In much the same way as I introduced many of you to your first video games thirty years ago, I leave you with one final recommendation.
Another of those fantastic little website games I get hooked on. Like Wordle and Guessdle and Contexto. In fact someone is going to steal this and use it for a radio contest or some dodgy git in a suit will rip it off and get one of the Bradleys or the Marks host it as a live Saturday night TV show with people from The Only Way Is GoggleBox or whatever shite you watch there now. Anyway it’s a good game you could play with the family this Easter weekend. If there is a bizarre accident involving all your other video games. And board games. And you need a conversation starter to bring everyone all together. That website is called…
It takes two Wikipedia entries, and you have to guess which one has the most words in it.
Some of them are easy…
List of Shipwrecks October 1885
v
Terrorism Act 2000
ANSWER:
List of Shipwrecks October 1885 – 5113
Terrorism Act 2000 – 7037
Or how about…
List of Mbundu Chiefs in Zambia
v
Poland at the Summer 1996 Olympics
ANSWER:
List of Mbundu Chiefs in Zambia - 6660
Poland at the Summer 1996 Olympics - 4135
Yeah. As you can see? I got that one wrong. Which is a bit embarrassing. Because I am Polish.
Some are harder.
The Ed Sheeran Song Perfect
v
Foreign relations of Poland
ANSWER:
The Ed Sheeran Song Perfect – 8476 words
Foreign relations of Poland – 8755 words
Some are simply crazy.
List of accidents and incidents involving military aircraft 1950-1954
v
Pig-faced women
ANSWER:
List of accidents and incidents involving military aircraft 1950-1954 – 42230
Pig-faced women – 8267
(PIC How very dare you!)
Yeah, I know. I thought having a Wikipedia entry for pig-faced women was a bit rude and insulting as well. So, I looked into it. And here is...
The legend of the pig faced women.
I am not making this up.
The story started in Europe in the 17th century and went thus: Once upon there was a wealthy woman who angered a witch so the switch gave her a pigs head. She covers it up and eventually gets married. Then she reveals her face to her new husband. PLOT TWIST. He is given the choice – she can appear beautiful to him but pig-like to others, or pig-like to him and beautiful to others.
Woah. And they say the choice Joel made at the end of The Last of Us was tough!
Anyway the husband says the choice is hers Lucky for all that choice breaks the spell and her pig-like appearance vanishes and they all live happily ever after. This was also the first time in history a husband has let the wife choose anything.
The more the story was told – the most people in England and Ireland believed it - in Dublin in the early 19th century they thought a pig faced woman live there . In late 1814 alleged portraits of her were published purporting to live in London. Soon many towns had their own pig-faced woman living allegedly somewhere. . As a result dodgy showmen exhibited living "pig-faced women" at fairs. These were not genuine women, but shaven bears dressed in women's clothing.
The last significant work to treat their existence as genuine was published in 1924. Today, the legend is almost forgotten. Like most of my broadcast career. OK so that’ sit for the last free bit – gave you a little bit more than you usually get. Cos it’s the last one. Thanks for being a free subscriber to this- I hope you got something out of it. I know I didn’t. And on that bombshell? By bye.
Dominik's Little Old Purple Column #49 FREE TEASER version